Lesson 62 LDR

What is a LDR ?

LDR means : Long Distance Relationship.


Who has a LDR ?

José has a few LDRs.


With whom ?

This time we will talk about a man, his name is Frank and he lives in France.


How long did this relationship last ?

Approximately 15 years until now.


In fact, not only with Frank, José has a LDR relationship with Frank’s family and his friends, more or less a dozen of people.

José has such a good relationship with them, that two girls in Frank’s family decided to change their last name to TSEROF on Facebook , the inversion of Jose’s last name FOREST.

José showed their new names to me.

I was amazed ; I said,”Wow, very creative !”

Really, I never thought that people could change their names in this way.

Very artistic !


This Januray, Frank’s new son was born, and he and his son’s mother named their son after José.

In fact, according to French culture, the parents could give three first names to their child, all of those three names become the child’s legal names.

When the child grows up,  he could choose any one as his official first name.


When José explained it to me, I said, “Wow, seems the life itself is not already complicated enough …”

Anyway, one of the three first names Frank gave to his son, was José.

Because the parents wish their son to grow up like José, and “be a good person. “


José was very touched, and he said, “Can you imagine that, a new born baby, in France, is named after me.”

I said, “Really touching.”

José sighed, “Such nice people, you should have taken the time to get to know them.”

I said, “What is the use ?”

José was totally taken aback, “What is the use ? What do you mean ?”


I said, “For so many years, you never met each other ?”

José said, “No.”

I asked, “And you never talked with them ?”

José said, “Hmmmm, I don’t think so ; we only chat online.”


“So, what is the use of this kind of long distance relationship ? Is it not wasting time online ?” I asked.

José was astonished, “Certainly not… I’m afraid that you don’t know what you are talking about.”


I said, “But in English, there is a saying, a friend in need is a friend indeed.”

José said, “Well, you could have your own view regarding long distance relationships ; you could have your own standards also. But certainly “being useful” is not a good reason, for any kind of real relationship.”

José continued, “Why do we want to have a relationship with somebody ? Because we enjoy the time being spent with this person. We feel great ; we are intellectuelly stiumualted ; we experience gratitude ; we share the same values in life ; we enjoy the same interests ; we are happy together… “

“And these are all good reasons to have a LDR. In fact, these reasons need to be fullfilled in any kind of the relationships, including  LDRs.”

“But certanily not because those relationships could be useful for us, or maybe one day we might need those friends’ help if we are in trouble.”

“You could be much rewarded in a LDR. “

“The problem is not the distance, the shared core values are the basic quality of the relationship. The real question here is where to find a quality relationship, LDR or not.”


José smiled, “And, another ting, life is full of surprises. Who told you that a  LDR is resultless ? Just look at yourself.”

“Ahhh,hahahah.” I laughed.

José said, “Hahahaha, indeed.”



28/04/2020 07:07 分类: 评论(0) 阅读()


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